February 10, 2019
3:44 p.m.
I wonder if you have any idea how hard it is for me to type 2019? This will be the last full year for me to be in my 50s. That's a bizarre concept for me. I didn't actually think I'd make it this far.
Let's be real here: the year 2000 was a sci-fi plot. It couldn't possibly happen. How on earth could I--young Paula--EVER turn 40? How on earth could the human race still be around in the year 2000?
No, I wasn't biting my nails, expecting the earth to blow up or something on New Year's Eve, 1999. By that time I had pretty much wrapped my mind around the concept of a continuation of life beyond the 20th century.
But at 16? Nope. Not possible. I would never get that old, and that would be that.
Now the year 2020 looms before me, and at some point in that decade, I will turn 60--if I make it that far. All indications point to a good possibility, but one never knows.
While I do admit to days when I feel about 912--which is the age I've always cited to inquiring children--I mostly feel pretty much like I did when I was 30ish. You know, until my bones creak and my lungs squeak.
2019. Jeez.
My oldest baby turns 40 this year. Imagine that--ME! With a 40-year-old kid! Yikes and stuff.
I was sick yesterday, and every time I moved, I was dizzy. Last evening I bent to get Molly's water dish and just kept going until I hit against the corner of the shelf sitting there. Thank God I wear glasses, or I might have seriously injured my eye.
I really hate those little reminders that, while I consider myself a strong woman, I am also fragile. Truthfully, it kind of ticks me off. I like strong me so much better than fragile me. Fragile me is a wimp. Her lungs are compromised and she has arthritis all over the place, and if a bear ever chases her she's just going to have to sit down and let it get her, because running is not an option.
Phooey on Fragile Me. Ha ha!
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5 Star review of Starting in the Middle of The End
Now this is a Strong Me moment. I will share this, because it makes me happy when people read my books and take the time to write a review.
I don't think readers realize how important reviews are to Indie writers like me. We really, really appreciate the people who buy our books, and getting feedback from our audience is a wonderful way for us to know that someone is enjoying our work.
Sometimes they don't enjoy it, and that's good to know, too. Everyone has different tastes, and we appreciate knowing what is working and what might need to be re-thought.
4 Start review of Starting in the Middle of the End
Not every review is going to be a 5-Star, but they are all appreciated and important.
To my readers who review--THANK YOU!
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Okay, last blog was about other books, today's was about mine. But we're all Independent writers, and so we need all the exposure we can get, and all we can give to each other.
I hope you'll take a little time out of your busy day and enjoy a good read!
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Molly has just squeezed her way in behind me. I don't know why, but she likes to nap behind my behind in this desk chair. I guess it's warm and cozy. She's not a furry fur-baby. She gets cold.
How cold is it where you are? We climbed our way into the 20s today. A heat wave! Of course, the sun is westering now, and it will soon be cooling off out there. Grateful for a warm house, that's for sure!
Hey, you know, I would love to hear from you. Comments are welcome!
And now, we have reached the end of me thinking my thinks for this time.
Blessings!
Sunday, February 10, 2019
Thursday, February 7, 2019
February 7, 2019
1:24 p.m.
Today, it's all about those books.
I love to read. We all know it. The last couple of days I checked out 2 novellas, and loved them. They're short and sweet, so no excuses! Give them a try--I've provided the links.
My recent review of Cathleen Townsend's "Stolen Legacy":
As a human, I fear the Kelpi. I don't want my last ride to lead to a watery death! I fear the Siren, whose sweet song could persuade me to commit crazy or treasonous acts, or perhaps lead me to a different sort of watery death.
I'm scared of the water. Truth.
I am not the sort of human who kills what she doesn't understand, but I might avoid them.
Silly me.
This is a story of loyalty and friendship that transcends boundries like species and proves there is bravery to be found in all.
While this is likely meant for younger readers, I don't hesitate in recommending it to all ages. It never hurts to be reminded that goodness isn't exclusive to one lifeform or another, but exists in all.
You can find it here:
Stolen Legacy by Cathleen Townsend
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My recent review of Lolli Powell's "The Gift":
Sometimes you read a story that turns out to be exactly what you needed at the time you needed it most. "The Gift" was certainly a present for me yesterday.
From the first page, when Carla is suddenly swept up in an emotion she least expected to feel in response to the sight of the person she'd least expect to cause it, I was swept up and knew I wouldn't be putting the book down until I was done.
I was wrong. By the end of the first chapter, I had to pause and get a box of Kleenex.
Reading this was like ripping the bandage off a wound and letting it bleed afresh. I mean this in the best possible way: a good bloodletting is a cathartic cleansing.
This story tapped a well of darkness I've been denying for some time now, and--wow!--do I feel better after letting those tears go. No doubt the well will re-fill. Life is that way. But for now, I am relieved.
Carla, the POV character, has been having a rough time. Following the recent death of her father, she's learned that her husband, a soldier, has gone missing in Afganistan.
It's Christmas Eve, and her now-widowed mother, Elizabeth, has come for the holiday, along with Carla's brother.
Elizabeth has chosen tonight, of all nights, to relate a tale from her past that she's never spoken of. It's a tale of love, loss and profound hope. But will Carla be able to endure the telling?
It has been a joy to read this story, and I highly recommend it.
You can find it here:
The Gift by Lolli Powell
1:24 p.m.
Today, it's all about those books.
I love to read. We all know it. The last couple of days I checked out 2 novellas, and loved them. They're short and sweet, so no excuses! Give them a try--I've provided the links.
My recent review of Cathleen Townsend's "Stolen Legacy":
As a human, I fear the Kelpi. I don't want my last ride to lead to a watery death! I fear the Siren, whose sweet song could persuade me to commit crazy or treasonous acts, or perhaps lead me to a different sort of watery death.
I'm scared of the water. Truth.
I am not the sort of human who kills what she doesn't understand, but I might avoid them.
Silly me.
This is a story of loyalty and friendship that transcends boundries like species and proves there is bravery to be found in all.
While this is likely meant for younger readers, I don't hesitate in recommending it to all ages. It never hurts to be reminded that goodness isn't exclusive to one lifeform or another, but exists in all.
You can find it here:
Stolen Legacy by Cathleen Townsend
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My recent review of Lolli Powell's "The Gift":
Sometimes you read a story that turns out to be exactly what you needed at the time you needed it most. "The Gift" was certainly a present for me yesterday.
From the first page, when Carla is suddenly swept up in an emotion she least expected to feel in response to the sight of the person she'd least expect to cause it, I was swept up and knew I wouldn't be putting the book down until I was done.
I was wrong. By the end of the first chapter, I had to pause and get a box of Kleenex.
Reading this was like ripping the bandage off a wound and letting it bleed afresh. I mean this in the best possible way: a good bloodletting is a cathartic cleansing.
This story tapped a well of darkness I've been denying for some time now, and--wow!--do I feel better after letting those tears go. No doubt the well will re-fill. Life is that way. But for now, I am relieved.
Carla, the POV character, has been having a rough time. Following the recent death of her father, she's learned that her husband, a soldier, has gone missing in Afganistan.
It's Christmas Eve, and her now-widowed mother, Elizabeth, has come for the holiday, along with Carla's brother.
Elizabeth has chosen tonight, of all nights, to relate a tale from her past that she's never spoken of. It's a tale of love, loss and profound hope. But will Carla be able to endure the telling?
It has been a joy to read this story, and I highly recommend it.
You can find it here:
The Gift by Lolli Powell
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Okay! These are not expensive in the least, they're quick and easy, and they're enjoyable.
Read on!
Bye!
Wednesday, January 30, 2019
January 30, 2019
4:03 p.m.
I'm going to start this post off by plugging my own books. I almost never use this platform to do that, but I've decided that if I'm really going to do this, I am going to have to self-promote once in a while.
I have an author page on Amazon, where all my books can be found. I'm sometimes unable to believe I have something like this going on--writing was a dream of mine since childhood that I thought would never happen in real life, but here it is:
Paula's Amazon Author Page
My newest novella can be found there, and I really had fun designing the cover:
4:03 p.m.
I'm going to start this post off by plugging my own books. I almost never use this platform to do that, but I've decided that if I'm really going to do this, I am going to have to self-promote once in a while.
I have an author page on Amazon, where all my books can be found. I'm sometimes unable to believe I have something like this going on--writing was a dream of mine since childhood that I thought would never happen in real life, but here it is:
Paula's Amazon Author Page
My newest novella can be found there, and I really had fun designing the cover:
Honestly, cover design can be frustrating. For most of my books, I have used photos I took myself. The other two used stock photos, but I am in the process of designing new covers for those as well. I want my covers to be original and unique to my own works.
Up until now, I have used selfies for my author photos, but over the Christmas holiday, I had head shots taken, courtesy of my son and daughter-in-law. So we may see new back-cover designs on all my books soon, with nice new author photos.
Four of my books follow a character who has regular conversations with deceased relatives who give her research material that lead to solving mysteries or just explaining inaccurate reporting regarding family history. The other two books have nothing to do with Emma at all.
Currently in the works: A sequel to the original Emma novel, the third novella in the Roger series (also Emma), and something completely different from any of the other books.
I also have an author page on Facebook, where you're as likely to get updates on baking cookies, snowfall and our little dog Molly as you are to get updates on my writing.
Okay, that's enough plugging for now. Go visit my pages. Like and follow, please! Watch for deals! Buy a book or two. Thank you very much!
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It looks like we have a busy summer ahead of us. Two family reunions! I love reunions. I'm hoping both are well-attended this year.
Two comic conventions, one in Denver and one in Salt Lake City, are on my radar. I absolutely must find the time for Denver. SLC is hopefully doable, too, but I won't die if I can't make that one.
First, though, I have to finish up dental work and have a physical, which means at least two trips to Denver before the comic convention.
I love to travel, but it is increasingly difficult for me to be away from my parents. I just stress out the whole time I'm not here. It's not like I don't have wonderful backup from my brothers and sisters, it's just that I'm somewhat of a control freak, I guess.
Anyway, I will find a way to make all this work out. The reunions are easy, because they have to go, too. Ha ha!
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I am amazed in this moment that the dog has not interrupted my writing yet. For the past few weeks, every time I sit down at the keyboard, she begins to demand my full attention. This must be the optimal time of day to do it--she's taking a nap! And I think she does that every day around this time. Hmm, four-ish might have to be my new work time...
I'll let you know how that goes. She's a pup. She's not predictable.
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Is it just me, or does everyone have that moment in the day when they realize that there's no actual dinner plan and nothing--NOTHING!--sounds good?
But, hey! I made ham and bean tostadas for lunch. That's a new one for me, and I've never heard of anyone else doing that. They were pretty tasty!
So now I am full of beans--literally--and dinner time is coming up pretty quickly. What to do, what to do?
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Oddly enough, I have done practically no reading the last couple of weeks. What is wrong with me?
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Okay, my peeps, it has been great, but now I really must fly upstairs and figure out what to feed the grownups.
Until we meet again!
Ta
Friday, January 18, 2019
January 18, 2019
12:42 p.m.
Well, I have been back in Wyoming for 16 days now, and I have spent a considerable amount of that time not feeling well.
Boo.
I flew back here from Denver on January 2nd. I went to the airport with a friend who was also flying out that day, and as he had only a small carry-on and was going somewhere entirely different than I, he was able to get through security quickly.
I, on the other hand, had a bag to check. The line was outrageously long, but moved along more quickly that you'd think possible due to the efficiency of the workers. Still, I was an hour just getting to the front of the line to check my bag and get a boarding pass, and then I still had to make my way through security.
I met my friend for breakfast, and then he left me to go catch his flight east.
I went to my own concourse area and began the job of waiting around. I was on a list for a possible second flight, and was wildly hoping that it wouldn't prove necessary to wait even longer. Luckily, I wasn't bumped! Whew!
Denver International Airport is ridiculously huge. A person could spend days there and not see it all, I'll bet. I've never made any attempt to see more than absolutely necessary--I would probably get lost.
Flights to Wyoming take off from far, far away from the main entrances. It is quite a walk from the underground train to the gates. Thank goodness for those wonderful moving walkways.
Going from a huge airport to the tiny Rock Springs, Wyoming airport is a bit of a shock. Not as much of a shock as going from Rock Springs to Denver, admittedly, but still, the difference is always a bit mind boggling.
I got off the plane, walked a few feet, went inside--and there I was. No walking, no underground train, no escalators. Just--there! And there was my brother, no searching required.
Ahhhh! After a long, long day at DIA, that was nice.
It is cold here. It has been cold all year!! Hahaha!
Anyway, I have had a dumb cold that started in Denver and has hung on ever since I got here. Hack and cough, so much fun.
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I am happy to report that Molly Mutt-Doggle missed me and was so excited to see me. That made me feel good.
This little dog is a joy to have around, but she is exactly like a toddler sometimes. She makes messes, wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to play, and creates chaos wherever she goes. She's so much fun.
I say she missed me, but I also have to admit that for the two weeks I was gone, I really missed her, too.
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4:53 p.m.
Quesadillas and chicken soup went over well with the parents today. I couldn't quite manage mine. I have been less than careful of my diet lately and the good old gastroparesis is reminding me that I can't do stupid things like that. I've been nauseated and headachy all day on top of the cold, so I feel a trifle grumpy at the moment.
I'm also in a week-long bout of insomnia. Whee!
I am FANTASTIC, oh boy.
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I'm kind of confused about book sales this week. I ran a special, a countdown, and reduced the price of my Kindle version on the newest book. I looked at sales after the special ended, and most of my sales were paperbacks at full price.
I'm not complaining, mind you. Hurray, and thanks to everyone who purchased. But, as I said, that confused me. Of course, I do understand that lots of people just prefer a real book to an e-book.
I sometimes feel like people don't see the sales until they're almost over, but I don't know how to get the information out in any more of a timely manner than posting and re-posting over and over all day long until people get sick of seeing my stuff.
Anyway, I am grateful for every sale, so thanks!
And, by the way, if you're interested, here is the link to my Amazon Author Page, where you can find all my books:
Paula's Author Page
I hope you'll check it out. It would be great if you'd give me a follow!
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Okay, I love you guys, but I'm sick. (Insert sad face here!) I'm going to go lay down and binge watch something and hopefully take a nap. (Yeah, right!)
I know I need to do some serious catching up. I will try!
Off to lots of blankets and fluids and stuff.
Ta!
12:42 p.m.
Well, I have been back in Wyoming for 16 days now, and I have spent a considerable amount of that time not feeling well.
Boo.
I flew back here from Denver on January 2nd. I went to the airport with a friend who was also flying out that day, and as he had only a small carry-on and was going somewhere entirely different than I, he was able to get through security quickly.
I, on the other hand, had a bag to check. The line was outrageously long, but moved along more quickly that you'd think possible due to the efficiency of the workers. Still, I was an hour just getting to the front of the line to check my bag and get a boarding pass, and then I still had to make my way through security.
I met my friend for breakfast, and then he left me to go catch his flight east.
I went to my own concourse area and began the job of waiting around. I was on a list for a possible second flight, and was wildly hoping that it wouldn't prove necessary to wait even longer. Luckily, I wasn't bumped! Whew!
Denver International Airport is ridiculously huge. A person could spend days there and not see it all, I'll bet. I've never made any attempt to see more than absolutely necessary--I would probably get lost.
Flights to Wyoming take off from far, far away from the main entrances. It is quite a walk from the underground train to the gates. Thank goodness for those wonderful moving walkways.
Going from a huge airport to the tiny Rock Springs, Wyoming airport is a bit of a shock. Not as much of a shock as going from Rock Springs to Denver, admittedly, but still, the difference is always a bit mind boggling.
I got off the plane, walked a few feet, went inside--and there I was. No walking, no underground train, no escalators. Just--there! And there was my brother, no searching required.
Ahhhh! After a long, long day at DIA, that was nice.
It is cold here. It has been cold all year!! Hahaha!
Anyway, I have had a dumb cold that started in Denver and has hung on ever since I got here. Hack and cough, so much fun.
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I am happy to report that Molly Mutt-Doggle missed me and was so excited to see me. That made me feel good.
This little dog is a joy to have around, but she is exactly like a toddler sometimes. She makes messes, wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to play, and creates chaos wherever she goes. She's so much fun.
I say she missed me, but I also have to admit that for the two weeks I was gone, I really missed her, too.
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4:53 p.m.
Quesadillas and chicken soup went over well with the parents today. I couldn't quite manage mine. I have been less than careful of my diet lately and the good old gastroparesis is reminding me that I can't do stupid things like that. I've been nauseated and headachy all day on top of the cold, so I feel a trifle grumpy at the moment.
I'm also in a week-long bout of insomnia. Whee!
I am FANTASTIC, oh boy.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I'm kind of confused about book sales this week. I ran a special, a countdown, and reduced the price of my Kindle version on the newest book. I looked at sales after the special ended, and most of my sales were paperbacks at full price.
I'm not complaining, mind you. Hurray, and thanks to everyone who purchased. But, as I said, that confused me. Of course, I do understand that lots of people just prefer a real book to an e-book.
I sometimes feel like people don't see the sales until they're almost over, but I don't know how to get the information out in any more of a timely manner than posting and re-posting over and over all day long until people get sick of seeing my stuff.
Anyway, I am grateful for every sale, so thanks!
And, by the way, if you're interested, here is the link to my Amazon Author Page, where you can find all my books:
Paula's Author Page
I hope you'll check it out. It would be great if you'd give me a follow!
_________________________________________________________________________________
Okay, I love you guys, but I'm sick. (Insert sad face here!) I'm going to go lay down and binge watch something and hopefully take a nap. (Yeah, right!)
I know I need to do some serious catching up. I will try!
Off to lots of blankets and fluids and stuff.
Ta!
Tuesday, January 1, 2019
January 1, 2019
8:30 p.m.
My bags are packed, I'm ready to go.
Not really!
Luckily, I don't have too much more to do and I really will be ready.
It would be nice if I could see straight. I think I've overdone the cold medicine!
Flying out of Denver and back to Wyoming tomorrow. I hear it's cold out there.
So, I did accomplish a couple of things in 2018. I did a Goodreads challenge last year and read 62 books! I went a little crazy and decided to read a bunch of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's books and stories. I read 20 of his books. Some were short story collections. Read some Stephen King and some autobiographies. But while doing this challenge I also did some reviews of books written by less known authors, and so I found some new authors to keep an eye on.
Along the way I published some stuff. That's always cool.
I went back and forth between Colorado and Wyoming a lot.
I did two comic book conventions, one in Denver and one in Salt Lake. Met VERY cool people.
Lots of family time. Always wonderful.
So 2018 wasn't a total bust!
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I gotta pack.
Happy New Year!
8:30 p.m.
My bags are packed, I'm ready to go.
Not really!
Luckily, I don't have too much more to do and I really will be ready.
It would be nice if I could see straight. I think I've overdone the cold medicine!
Flying out of Denver and back to Wyoming tomorrow. I hear it's cold out there.
So, I did accomplish a couple of things in 2018. I did a Goodreads challenge last year and read 62 books! I went a little crazy and decided to read a bunch of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's books and stories. I read 20 of his books. Some were short story collections. Read some Stephen King and some autobiographies. But while doing this challenge I also did some reviews of books written by less known authors, and so I found some new authors to keep an eye on.
Along the way I published some stuff. That's always cool.
I went back and forth between Colorado and Wyoming a lot.
I did two comic book conventions, one in Denver and one in Salt Lake. Met VERY cool people.
Lots of family time. Always wonderful.
So 2018 wasn't a total bust!
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I gotta pack.
Happy New Year!
Monday, December 31, 2018
December 31, 2018
7:02 p.m.
Well, it is New Year's Eve, and true to form, I am sick as a dog. I make it a habit to be sick on at least one holiday a year, and it's generally either Christmas or New Year's.
I am hoping and praying this will run it's course quickly, because I don't want to fly while feeling this way, and I'm scheduled to leave on the 2nd day of the New Year.
Pooh.
Today has been cold and snowy. We didn't get a white Christmas, but New Year's is definitely white.
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It is New Year's Eve, and I will be spending it on the sofa, watching scary movies and drinking tea.
Sounds pretty good, right? Kids are out, all viewing choices are mine. Between the tea and the cold remedies, I will probably be asleep before the clock strikes 12.
I'm okay with that.
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I'm trying to hit a positive note, an "I'm grateful for" moment, but the truth is, this has not been a great year.
Certainly some good things happened. 365 straight days of suckiness is impossible, right?
So, let see...
Well, we didn't get any new HUMAN babies, but we did get Molly. She's our new baby, and we love her so much. She came along in time for a very nice family reunion in Colorado, and she was the belle of the ball. Not everyone made it to the reunion--Dad's sister was absent, but her sons both came, and that was wonderful. All his other siblings were there, and I am so grateful they got to see Dad earlier this year.
My Aunt and cousin came for a visit in September. As it turned out, that was to be her final journey, and she visited all her siblings, children and grandchildren on that trip. I know my mother will treasure those days she got to be with her sister. I do, too.
Mom replaced both knees and a hip this year, and her mobility is much better now. She's not back to 100%, but her healing is moving along well.
My nephew lived through a horrific accident and has recovered remarkably well.
I spent time with kids and grandkids, parents and siblings, and that time is priceless.
But I'm less than honest if I don't admit that 2018 has been a tough one.
I could make a list of the reasons why, but I won't. Suffice to say that I'm hopeful that things will be better in the next year.
And so, I bid you a Happy New Year, and I will make my way to the sofa with a cup of tea, a box of tissues and a blanket, to hopefully get scared silly by the play list I've selected to watch.
See you next year!
7:02 p.m.
Well, it is New Year's Eve, and true to form, I am sick as a dog. I make it a habit to be sick on at least one holiday a year, and it's generally either Christmas or New Year's.
I am hoping and praying this will run it's course quickly, because I don't want to fly while feeling this way, and I'm scheduled to leave on the 2nd day of the New Year.
Pooh.
Today has been cold and snowy. We didn't get a white Christmas, but New Year's is definitely white.
_________________________________________________________________________________
It is New Year's Eve, and I will be spending it on the sofa, watching scary movies and drinking tea.
Sounds pretty good, right? Kids are out, all viewing choices are mine. Between the tea and the cold remedies, I will probably be asleep before the clock strikes 12.
I'm okay with that.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I'm trying to hit a positive note, an "I'm grateful for" moment, but the truth is, this has not been a great year.
Certainly some good things happened. 365 straight days of suckiness is impossible, right?
So, let see...
Well, we didn't get any new HUMAN babies, but we did get Molly. She's our new baby, and we love her so much. She came along in time for a very nice family reunion in Colorado, and she was the belle of the ball. Not everyone made it to the reunion--Dad's sister was absent, but her sons both came, and that was wonderful. All his other siblings were there, and I am so grateful they got to see Dad earlier this year.
My Aunt and cousin came for a visit in September. As it turned out, that was to be her final journey, and she visited all her siblings, children and grandchildren on that trip. I know my mother will treasure those days she got to be with her sister. I do, too.
Mom replaced both knees and a hip this year, and her mobility is much better now. She's not back to 100%, but her healing is moving along well.
My nephew lived through a horrific accident and has recovered remarkably well.
I spent time with kids and grandkids, parents and siblings, and that time is priceless.
But I'm less than honest if I don't admit that 2018 has been a tough one.
I could make a list of the reasons why, but I won't. Suffice to say that I'm hopeful that things will be better in the next year.
And so, I bid you a Happy New Year, and I will make my way to the sofa with a cup of tea, a box of tissues and a blanket, to hopefully get scared silly by the play list I've selected to watch.
Those Grandchildren of mine!
Thursday, December 27, 2018
December 27, 2018
2:45 p.m.
Well, it has been over a month since I posted anything. I just wrote a great deal of news and decided that it wasn't what I wanted to say, so here I am, starting from scratch.
November 20th seems a lifetime ago. Playing with the dog, getting a kick out of her antics, all seems far away at the moment. Although, to tell you the truth, I am so grateful to have Molly around, because she fills the house with joy.
She's in Wyoming right now, though. And I am in Colorado.
I came on the 18th. I had purchased tickets for the trip after I broke a corner off a front tooth. I got a good deal, so of course they were non-refundable and couldn't be exchanged.
How was I to know December would turn into such a crock of doo-doo?
My sister had already arranged to take the time while I'm away to stay with my parents. Thank God for that. My brother also make plans to be with them for Christmas. I'm so happy that my parents have had someone with them every day.
It doesn't keep me from being a worry-wart. And I still feel like a stinky skunk for leaving at just this time, although I never would have planned it this way and things just happened to fall the way they did for no discernible reason.
December 2018. Blah and Bah, humbug to ye!
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I don't suppose I've ever seen a more unfriendly month. It started with news from my Dad's best friend. I received a private message asking me to let Dad know that his friend's beloved wife had passed the night before, on December 7th.
Well, suffice to say, giving bad news is a bitch in any circumstances, but there followed the hell of repetition. I told Dad. Then I told him again. And again. He couldn't grasp it. He was--and is--deeply concerned for his dear friend, but he hasn't been able to retain the information.
He has, however, moments of supreme clarity. We sat having coffee the morning after the funeral. He said, "I can't believe she's gone. I can't imagine what my friend is going through. Did you know that they've been together since they were kids?"
"Yes, I heard someone say they had found notes he wrote to her when they were ten years old," I replied.
"Ten," Dad said, nodding. "They married while they were still in school. They went to sleep together, woke up together, ate together. They talked to each other every day. Today, he woke up alone. He didn't have anyone to talk to at breakfast." Dad let out a watery sigh. "Oh, my friend! He must feel like he's been broken in half."
I couldn't disagree. It was rare to see one without the other. I haven't seen him yet, myself, but I know my first impulse when I do will be to ask where she is. I will bite my tongue and give him a hug instead.
"My friend," Dad told me, "has God, though. When you have God, you always know you'll see your love again."
And we looked at each other with tears in our eyes and drank our coffee.
An hour later he asked me if something had happened. I said yes. He said he'd thought it was a bad dream.
In the meantime, I had gotten another message, this one from my cousin. He asked me to let my mother know that her sister had had a stroke. This was December 10th.
End of life decisions were made, and on December 17th, my Aunt passed peacefully in her sleep.
My mother was unable to make the trip to California to say goodbye to her sister. She felt guilty about it, but she has been through three surgeries this year and her health hasn't returned to normal. Such a long trip would have been too hard for her, and she has no need to feel bad about that.
(Says the woman who feels guilty for coming home to do her dental work and spend Christmas with her kids. People are weird.)
As I stated in the beginning, I left the next day. So, yeah. Guilt. But I thank God my sister was able to come, that my brother came for Christmas and that my other sister and brother live right in town. I know my parents are in excellent hands.
My tooth is fixed. My medications are waiting for me to pick them up at the pharmacy. I go back to Wyoming next week.
It hasn't felt at all like a holiday this year.
_________________________________________________________________________________
11:06 p.m.
On Christmas Day we went to a friend's home for dinner and had a very nice visit. The food was quite good, the company even better.
The little ones got to beat up a pinata, and I have to say, that thing was well built. It took quite a beating to get it to give up its treats.
That was a nice day, but it still didn't feel like Christmas to me. Maybe next year.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I have been here a week. My accomplishments? Well, my tooth is fixed and my prescriptions are ready to be picked up at the pharmacy. I've been scolded by my doctors' office for not refilling them sooner, and I took it like a champ.
I won $3.00 on a scratch ticket, which, coincidentally cost me $3.00.
I am on a roll!
I have caught up on some television shows.
And I may have managed to save the life of my Kindle, which is over 5 years old and contains many good books that I don't wish to lose. I will have to wait for a few hours to see if this latest attempt at Kindle resuscitation is a success.
The last think I hope to accomplish before I leave on the 2nd is a good haircut. Emphasis on "good". My hair is driving me nuts.
Oh! I didn't tell you, but I also finished a book. It was released on Christmas Eve. You can find it here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07L4GM4PN.
There's probably lots more catching up to do. Certainly, I need to resolve to do better at this.
Good night, everyone.
2:45 p.m.
Well, it has been over a month since I posted anything. I just wrote a great deal of news and decided that it wasn't what I wanted to say, so here I am, starting from scratch.
November 20th seems a lifetime ago. Playing with the dog, getting a kick out of her antics, all seems far away at the moment. Although, to tell you the truth, I am so grateful to have Molly around, because she fills the house with joy.
She's in Wyoming right now, though. And I am in Colorado.
I came on the 18th. I had purchased tickets for the trip after I broke a corner off a front tooth. I got a good deal, so of course they were non-refundable and couldn't be exchanged.
How was I to know December would turn into such a crock of doo-doo?
My sister had already arranged to take the time while I'm away to stay with my parents. Thank God for that. My brother also make plans to be with them for Christmas. I'm so happy that my parents have had someone with them every day.
It doesn't keep me from being a worry-wart. And I still feel like a stinky skunk for leaving at just this time, although I never would have planned it this way and things just happened to fall the way they did for no discernible reason.
December 2018. Blah and Bah, humbug to ye!
_________________________________________________________________________________
I don't suppose I've ever seen a more unfriendly month. It started with news from my Dad's best friend. I received a private message asking me to let Dad know that his friend's beloved wife had passed the night before, on December 7th.
Well, suffice to say, giving bad news is a bitch in any circumstances, but there followed the hell of repetition. I told Dad. Then I told him again. And again. He couldn't grasp it. He was--and is--deeply concerned for his dear friend, but he hasn't been able to retain the information.
He has, however, moments of supreme clarity. We sat having coffee the morning after the funeral. He said, "I can't believe she's gone. I can't imagine what my friend is going through. Did you know that they've been together since they were kids?"
"Yes, I heard someone say they had found notes he wrote to her when they were ten years old," I replied.
"Ten," Dad said, nodding. "They married while they were still in school. They went to sleep together, woke up together, ate together. They talked to each other every day. Today, he woke up alone. He didn't have anyone to talk to at breakfast." Dad let out a watery sigh. "Oh, my friend! He must feel like he's been broken in half."
I couldn't disagree. It was rare to see one without the other. I haven't seen him yet, myself, but I know my first impulse when I do will be to ask where she is. I will bite my tongue and give him a hug instead.
"My friend," Dad told me, "has God, though. When you have God, you always know you'll see your love again."
And we looked at each other with tears in our eyes and drank our coffee.
An hour later he asked me if something had happened. I said yes. He said he'd thought it was a bad dream.
In the meantime, I had gotten another message, this one from my cousin. He asked me to let my mother know that her sister had had a stroke. This was December 10th.
End of life decisions were made, and on December 17th, my Aunt passed peacefully in her sleep.
My mother was unable to make the trip to California to say goodbye to her sister. She felt guilty about it, but she has been through three surgeries this year and her health hasn't returned to normal. Such a long trip would have been too hard for her, and she has no need to feel bad about that.
(Says the woman who feels guilty for coming home to do her dental work and spend Christmas with her kids. People are weird.)
As I stated in the beginning, I left the next day. So, yeah. Guilt. But I thank God my sister was able to come, that my brother came for Christmas and that my other sister and brother live right in town. I know my parents are in excellent hands.
My tooth is fixed. My medications are waiting for me to pick them up at the pharmacy. I go back to Wyoming next week.
It hasn't felt at all like a holiday this year.
_________________________________________________________________________________
11:06 p.m.
On Christmas Day we went to a friend's home for dinner and had a very nice visit. The food was quite good, the company even better.
The little ones got to beat up a pinata, and I have to say, that thing was well built. It took quite a beating to get it to give up its treats.
That was a nice day, but it still didn't feel like Christmas to me. Maybe next year.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I have been here a week. My accomplishments? Well, my tooth is fixed and my prescriptions are ready to be picked up at the pharmacy. I've been scolded by my doctors' office for not refilling them sooner, and I took it like a champ.
I won $3.00 on a scratch ticket, which, coincidentally cost me $3.00.
I am on a roll!
I have caught up on some television shows.
And I may have managed to save the life of my Kindle, which is over 5 years old and contains many good books that I don't wish to lose. I will have to wait for a few hours to see if this latest attempt at Kindle resuscitation is a success.
The last think I hope to accomplish before I leave on the 2nd is a good haircut. Emphasis on "good". My hair is driving me nuts.
Oh! I didn't tell you, but I also finished a book. It was released on Christmas Eve. You can find it here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07L4GM4PN.
There's probably lots more catching up to do. Certainly, I need to resolve to do better at this.
Good night, everyone.
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