Wednesday, March 20, 2019
5:11 p.m.

I wasn't planning to write just now--I have been doing some financial stuff (yuck!)--and my plan was to go watch something inane on television, so I wouldn't have to think too hard.

But, no go. Molly crawled up behind me in the desk chair and fell asleep, and I don't have the heart to wake her up. So...

Hello!

Hey, it's the first day of Spring. The sun is shining, and the thermometer told me it was over 40 degrees, but for some reason, I have been cold all day. I suppose I just have to be contrary. (Mom has always said so!)

So, the news feed in recent times has me contemplating the joys of being a hermit. I mean, is it just me, or do people really just suck? I don't know a lot of sucky people personally, but in general, based on what I see and hear out there in the lovely old world, a lot of sucky people exist, and they are the ones making all the noise and all the news.

I recently wrote a novella about a world gone wrong, and some of the people who survived who will try to set things right. And yet, as I tried like hell to plot some sort of happy ending, I knew that there were probably some sucky people who survived and who will try to make things continue to go wrong.

Human nature? Free will? What is wrong with some people? Why do they choose hate over love, war over peace, discord over harmony?

(I suppose "those people" are over in their own corners asking that question about me. That makes me sad.)

Call me weird, but I just want to gather in a large outdoor area filled with tables and benches, and have a pot luck with everyone. Bring something to share, sit with a stranger, eat and laugh. Play music. Dance.

But, like any wedding reception attendee will tell you, there's always that one guy. The guy who has too many beers--or a belly ache, maybe-- and decides that some feckless, laughing man is after his woman. Then all hell breaks loose, people take sides and the war begins.

Who is "that one guy"? Why does he always have to show up and spoil a good time?

I could go on with this, but everyone who reads will put a different person in the "that one guy" role, and choose their own good time that he's destined to spoil.

Sheesh. I knew I should wake up the dog and go watch television.
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Speaking of sleeping Molly, she likes to take late naps and then stay up all night. She reminds me of all the toddlers I have ever known.

Yeah, that's my backside in the background. For some reason, she likes to nap right here. What the heck, it keeps me warm. Silly Molly.
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I have been waiting for a call from the pharmacy all day. I swear, it takes my Dad's doctor's office forever to get a simple prescription called in sometimes! It's frustrating.

I have lived in the Metro Denver area for a long time, and there are so may choices for doctors there. They all know it, so they seem to work harder at patient satisfaction. There's not a lot of competition around here, so these doctors are a bit lax.

Or maybe I'm just grumpy...

Nope. They are slow.
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Okay, some books, as promised. Fiction, this time.

El Hermano by Carmen Baca
This is currently only available in paperback, but well worth the wait. It is the true story of a young man growing up in New Mexico whose upbringing and choices will lead him to a life of service to the Lord and his community.

Bellingwood Series Books 1-3 by Diane Greenwood Muir
Polly moves to small town Iowa to start a new business in a renovated school building. This is a charming series. Diane is a busy lady who also has a newsletter you might like to look into if you enjoy her books. Check her out at: Nammynools

These are a couple of really good Indie authors I've been reading for a while now. I recommend getting to know them better.
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Okay, my good friends, I'm off to make something--I don't know what yet--for dinner.

Have a great evening!

March 19, 2019
4:34 p.m.

Sometimes I think the whole world has gone completely crazy.

Nebraska and Iowa are experiencing dreadful flooding. Farms and ranches are underwater, livestock is dead or in danger of dying, people have lost their homes and everything in them.

What's on the news? An actress bribed her kids' way into college!

Trump tweets! (AGAIN!!!)

What the hell is wrong with this picture? Why are we more concerned with stupidity and celebrities than with real, everyday people dealing with real life-threatening situations?

And by the way, where's your hamburger and milk coming from after this, people? Not to mention your veggies?

I can't do much, but I can certainly share this link to all  my readers, and hope that by spreading the word, Nebraskans will get some much needed publicity and help:

How to Help Nebraska

I have searched for similar information for Iowa and so far, I haven't found anything, but I will let you know if I do.

Don't drive on flooded roadways, please. "Turn around, don't drown" is great advise!

Sorry to rant a bit, but we really need to start paying more attention to life altering events and not to celebrity scandals and the "Twitterverse" whining guys.
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5:16 p.m.

Flooding notwithstanding, I'm so ready for winter to be gone. Spending too much time indoors is not good for the parents. We all need fresh air, but we all get cold.

I just want to sit on the deck and watch the dog play in the yard. Please?!!
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Once in a while, I feel the need to share some reading recommendations. You're welcome!

Life's That Way by Jim Beaver.

Alice Cooper: Golf Monster by Alice Cooper

As You Wish by Cary Elwes

These are non-fiction. Tomorrow I will share some fiction by some Independent writers, because I can do that--help writes reach more readers!

(That means you. Read! Learn stuff. Be entertained.)
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Must feed people!

Until we meet again!

Sunday, March 17, 2019
7:43 p.m.

Oh, boy, sometimes I feel like no one is listening...

No, I'm not about to go off on another rant about being mad at God. I get mad at Him sometimes. It happens. But no, that's not what I mean.

I don't know that I'm entirely sure what I DO mean, though...

Okay, here's the thing. I have time to think, some days, when I'm cooking or whatever it is I do around here. It occurs to me that my parents--who were always quite social--seem to have been forgotten.

Yes, it's true that they are in their 80s now, incredible as that seems, and so they have lost friends in the past few years. But they have others, still. And I find myself wishing that the phone would ring, or someone would just come to the door.

That's it. I wish someone would remember to visit--here or on the phone. I wish someone would remember to ask them out sometimes. A movie, a lunch date, even pie and a cup of coffee.

I'm here with them nearly every single day--they must get tired of me sometimes and want to see other people!

I have suggested the Senior Center, but can't seem to convince them to go. They feel like they don't know a lot of people anymore. I feel like they need to meet some new ones if that's the case.

When I'm at home, I am pretty likely to just walk out the door, catch a bus and go wherever I like. I don't mind going alone--I'm anti-social that way. Ha ha! I talk to whomever I wish and do as I want, and answer to no one.

Here--not so much. No bus. Not many places to go. And I really, really need to take the time to get a driver's license! I don't need one in Denver--I haven't had a car for over a decade and I've never missed a thing about driving! But this place is a different scenario altogether.

I reckon if I was driving, I could push them out the door more often to go out and do things. But in the meantime, I am very disappointed that no one seems to remember to include them.

They're still here!!!

Okay, winter is hard, I know. No one really wants to go out that much when it's cold. But, Spring is coming.

I need to get them back out and involved. Someone please suggest to me how I can do that!
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Once upon a time, I got married. And I was married for a while, and together for a while before that. And I think today might actually be an anniversary. I don't know how to feel about the fact that I can't really remember for sure...

Wow. That's kind of sad.

Except I don't even feel sad, except for the memory loss issue. Hmm...

I might have to look this up. Somewhere.

Meh. Whatever.
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Molly has been having issues with the time change. She believes she should be allowed a nap right about now, and then stay up and play all night.

No, not a toddler. A Chihuahua.

Oh, right. Same difference.

Anyway, she needs cuddles and I'm typing one handed--not well, I might add. So I'm going to take her downstairs to play and tire herself out.

Good night!

Wednesday, March 13, 2019
11:18 a.m.

They said snow--and they were right. I guess weather folk have to be right sometimes, but I would much prefer they were wrong about this one. Snow--blah!

In Colorado they are calling this storm a "bomb cyclone". Well...that sounds ominous. I guess I better call my kids! I'm grateful that the roof has been repaired on the old casa, because--wow! "Bomb cyclone".

I don't know what they're calling the storm here in Wyoming. A "storm", maybe? A "blizzard"? the only Blizzard I'm interested in is a Brownie Blizzard from Dairy Queen. And I'm not even very interested in that.
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I'm Author of the Week on Book Whores Facebook group this week. This might mean nothing to you, but I'm honored.

This affords me the opportunity to post a lot about my books, four of which happen to be on sale this week. But I can't post anything! Something is up with either the Internet--possible due to this storm--or Facebook. So that is a bummer!
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Stormy day equals spaghetti dinner around here, so I must be off and start preparing the meal.

I hope you have a great mid-week day. If you're out and about in Wyoming, Colorado, Utah and such--please be careful and stay safe!

Ta!

Monday, March 11, 2019
3:25 p.m.

I started the day with a message that I was chosen Author of the Week in the Facebook group "Book Whores"! I don't know how they choose, but--hey! I'm honored!

Coincidentally, this is the same week I am running a book promotion with four of my titles on sale for $0.99 each. Here are the links:

S23HF50

Emma: Ancestors' Tales

Roger's Revelation

Roger's Dilemma

I hope you will check these out and grab a copy while the prices are reduced--some over 75%!
It's always so nice to have someone reading your book.

I have an author page on Amazon, and it would be great if you'd check that out as well!

Author Paula Shablo

You can also find me on Facebook:

Author/Writer Paula Shablo

Ah, the glorious art of self-promotion. I'm not very talented at this particular art. I always feel somewhat...I don't know...silly? But I am feeling really good about being named "Author of the Week" somewhere, and so I'm going to promote myself and feel okay with it!

Buy some books! That'll make me feel REALLY good.
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3:43 p.m.

The day is grey. More snow may be on the way. I'm diligently avoiding the weather reports. It is March, and I am weary of winter. Spring, please come!

Lunch with my sister and brother-in-law is always nice. They usually come on Mondays. It breaks up the sameness of every other day of the week. Turkey and mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie--you can't beat that! Yummy! I made dinner, and my sister made the pie. Then she didn't eat the pie, because she gave up sweets for Lent.

Well, that reminded me a bit of yesterday's rant, so I guess I will give up getting mad at entities that may or may not exist over things that no one has any control of or cure for. At least, I will TRY.

Mom and Dad's laundry is all done. I just have to talk myself into bringing it upstairs. I'm feeling kind of achy today, and it's making me lazy.

The achy and tired me I will blame on the time change. Messes me up every time! Our bodies are wired to wake up, eat, work and sleep in a particular manner, and changing the clocks and telling our bodies that we now have to do those things an hour earlier--or later-- is just ridiculous. Even the dog is messed up over it. She knows when she wants to eat or go to bed. She's not going to listen to me when I tell her that she has to do it an hour earlier than her body clock has been programmed.

Oh well, I think dogs are smarter than people, anyway. She did what she wanted yesterday in spite of the clock, and be danged with the time change. You rock, Molly.
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If you want to enjoy some quick reads, you might want to check this out:

Write the Story

Each month, a photo prompt is given, and writers are asked to tell a short story inspired by their impressions. I've participated, and read many of the stories contributed. It's amazing how widely varied the stories are! None are very long, so this is great for when you only have a few minutes for reading.
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I mentioned Lent a little bit ago. I wonder if I should give up news reports? They're a bummer, though... I think I'm supposed to give up something good...
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Well, my peeps, that laundry is not going to bring itself upstairs, so I am off!

Have a fabulous rest of your Monday!

Sunday, March 10, 2019
4:21 p.m.

Well, I finally did it--I Googled myself!

I didn't expect to find anything, really. I'm not famous or anything.

I found a lot! My address is out there. My political affiliation is out there. A phone number is listed, but it is wrong. So that's cool. Because I get too many unsolicited calls already!

My books are out there, too. I originally listed them on Amazon, but they are available to order at Barnes and Nobel, Wal-Mart, E-Bay and a lot of other places! That sure surprised me.

My Amazon page is there, my Goodreads page is there, even my Medium page is there. My blog and G+ links are also there.

Wow. I'm a searchable entity.

Now I have to process how I feel about that...
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Molly is sleeping behind me, keeping my backside warm while I work. I swear, she's dreaming. It doesn't seem to be a great dream.

Maybe she's squashed. Silly dog!
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Well, I went on a bit of a rant this morning and my poor sister got an earful about how angry I am with God or the Universe or the Multiverse or whatever it is. I'm going to hell, if there is one.

Look, I sort of believe that people should get what they deserve. Apparently God doesn't work that way. Killers abound and get away with it. Rapists get slaps on the wrist. Child molesters get probation.

The good guys, though? My Dad got up every morning for decades and served his family, his friends, his community and his God. His reward? Dementia.

Where's a loving God in this scenario?

I mean, what the hell? Whatever happened to "Let the punishment fit the crime" and "Cheaters never prosper" and even "What goes around comes around"?

Why do the bad guys get all the money and all the breaks, while the good guys get shafted?

I call bullshit.

Okay, it has been a bad week. And I know--I KNOW!!-- that there are so many things to be grateful for. So many. But-- damn it!

Mom argues that it is not God. It's the devil. Well...God made him, too.

I hate feeling this way. Generally speaking, my relationship with God is ambiguous on good days, so bad days do nothing to get me in a super "Pro-God" state of mind.

And again, I hate feeling this way.

When I was a kid, I could feel the goodness of God. I mean, literally feel it. It was all around me, and my faith was unshakable. I loved going to church, loved the atmosphere of the place, the smells--everything about it made me feel good.

Then...well, life happened. And happened again. And I had so many questions! Why, if God loved me, had this thing been allowed? Why, if God loved me, hadn't He stopped that from occurring? After all, I was doing everything He said I should be doing, and not doing the things He said I shouldn't. Sometimes-- most of the time, in fact--that was really hard! So why wasn't he living up to His side of the bargain?

I'm almost 60, and having had my faith shaken repeatedly and sometimes quite cruelly, it's a blue-eyed wonder that I even think about God at all, let alone still believe (sort of; sometimes) that He exists at all.

Why shouldn't I doubt? Have you looked at the world lately? Have you taken note of the "leaders" we've been "blessed" with? To those who say God placed them in their positions of power, I would like to ask: "And this is a LOVING God?"

I'm pissed. I want my father back. MY father, the one who is disappearing day by day.

I can't fix this. And God won't fix it. Why? I don't know. What's His end-game? What's His divine purpose in causing a man who went to church every single day with the faith of a child and followed all the teachings to become a man who no longer cares if he puts on a clean shirt?

I don't understand. And like all humans, I don't like what I don't understand. I also don't believe there's any chance that this sort of suffering has a divine purpose. It's just cruel. Cruel to the sufferer and cruel to those who have no choice but to watch helplessly, because there's nothing else they can do.

You know what makes me the maddest? It's that I do still believe, and I do still pray that things will get better--or at least not get worse. It's that I feel guilty for feeling angry at God for not fixing things that He supposedly has the power to fix. Why should I feel guilty--God should feel guilty for not coming through with a cure for this awful affliction.

Yeah, I'm pissed that I am pretty sure I can go to hell for feeling this way. I'm not perfect, by any stretch of the imagination, but I have tried to be better and to do right and to stay on the straight and narrow path. I don't kill, or rape, or rob banks. I don't steal from the store or disrespect my parents. But I do get mad at God, so... the devil may very well get me.

And in the meantime, I will be broke and sick and brokenhearted and I will have a million questions when the time comes, starting with "If you love us, then why---?"

Blind faith and free will...my ass.
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Remember back in the day when I said I was only ever going to say nice things on my blog?

Big fail today.

You know what? Oh, well. I just said I wasn't perfect. Now you know it's true.

But I'm sorry, anyway.

I have this overwhelming desire to delete everything, but you know what? I trust in your understanding.

I love you people.

I think you know that, while I am upset, I clearly have something I'm clinging to...

I still hope...

And this is enough for now. Enough writing, enough ranting, and enough.

I'm going to go fold some clothes and feel normal.

Cheers!

March 5, 2019
12:44 p.m.

A Very Happy Birthday shout out to my son, Sam! Another year has gone by, and you've hit the next decade milestone. Not the big 2-0, either.

Or even the 3-0.

Forty years ago today, I gave birth to my first child.

Wow. Forty years. The really big 4-0.

It doesn't seem possible that so much time has gone by. I can still remember how he felt in my arms, tiny and warm and smelling sweetly of baby powder. I still remember how he got his name-- all that hair! 

Where does the time go?

Anyway, if you see Sam today, remind him that his mom is getting old. Ha ha!

I'm awfully proud and happy to call this guy my son! Happy Birthday, kiddo! I love you!

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I thought I was going to get away without getting sick this winter season, but...nope! Got me. My throat is sore and I'm congested. Blah!

Still gotta get the work done, though. Breakfast--check. Dishwasher loaded--check. Roast in the slow cooker--check. Go, me!

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New tax crap is pretty much just that--crap. Did you make more money in 2018? What's your refund look like? You didn't get a raise, you got shafted. 

Seriously, if this new "tax break" helped you out, let me know. Because for my kids and friends, it has been a bad joke. 

You know, because none of us are billionaires.

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I'm super excited to learn that Alice Cooper will be at FanX Salt Lake City next month, and even more excited that I'm going!!!! Gotta cross "Meet Alice Cooper in person" off my bucket list. Seriously, this might be the one who will really make me gush like a fan-girl. Over forty years being a fan--whew! Eeeeek!

Stay tuned for some serious fan-girl moments.

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Hmm. I think the medicine might be working. I can smell the roast. It smells good. If only I felt like eating!

Molly is right behind me on the desk chair, keeping my back warm. She naps while I write. What a girl! Such a cute little sweetheart this dog is. This is probably really good for my posture--I have to sit up straight with my feet on the floor so I don't lean back and squash her. 

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Well. I am going to go check on my roast and maybe lie down for a few minutes. I don't like feeling like doo-doo. What a waste of my precious time!

Everyone have an excellent rest of your day!

Ta!